Attachment--A Hot but Frequently Misunderstood Concept

As a domestic relations mediator and Guardian ad Litem, I frequently see parties and attorneys bandying about the concepts of "attachment" and "attachment disorder" for greater leverage in the dispute, and "[t]he concept of attachment can readily tip the scales in custody and parenting-time cases involving infants and young children."   See Pamela S. Ludolph & Mildred D. Dale, Attachment in Child Custody:  An Additive Factor, Not a Determinative One, Family Law Quarterly, Vol. 46, No. 1, Spring 2012.  However, as Ludolph & Dale detail, "attachment is often incompletely understood in both the legal and mental health communities." 

What Do You Tell Your Kids About Divorce?

As a domestic relations mediator, I see my clients struggle with how and when to tell their kids about their upcoming divorce.  I've recently come across a helpful article on the subject by Sol R. Rappaport, Ph.D., a Licensed Clinical Psychologist, in the Summer issue of the ABA's Family Advocate.  Id., Telling Your Children About the Divorce.  Here's some of his excellent comments and suggestions.

Recent Foreclosure Consent Decree

As a foreclosure mediator in New Mexico, I like to report on news/cases in this special area and the big news right now is the Consent Decree/Judgment entered on April 4, 2012  against 5 financial defendants: 

- Bank of America

- Citigroup

- JP Morgan Chase

- Ally Financial/GMAC, and

- Wells Fargo

The Consent Decree derived from investigations concerning the "robo-signing" of foreclosure

What to Bring to Divorce Mediation

As a domestic relations mediator, I'm often asked "what should I bring to mediation?"  The short answer is, "whatever documents you think you need related to custody, child support and/or property division."  This is not intended to be flip.  However, you know the facts of your own case better than I do--and the level of accord and amicability between yourself and your spouse or partner.  Specifically, what do you think he or she will need to see to accept your claims about salary, your debt, etc.? 

How a Mediator Can Help in Foreclosure - More Thoughts*

I've written in a previous blog about the role and utility of mediation in foreclosure matters.  Here are a couple of additional tips and pointers raised in a recent teleconference devoted to foreclosure mediation, including encouraging the parties to discuss how numbers were crunched,  locating the Pooling Service Agreement, and identifying the agent responsible for maintaining the file in the future.

Mediating Neighborhood Disputes*

As a "community mediator" in Albuquerque, New Mexico, I deal with a lot of disputes between neighbors.  Today, these neighbors are increasingly part of a well-regulated association, and their disputes that are particularly amenable to mediation due to the sensitive or "hot button" nature of issues concerning home.

NM Separation, Divorce and Parentage Proceedings

Although I began my alternative dispute resolution (ADR) career in the labor/employment field, I have since expanded my practice to include domestic relation mediation and child protection related work.  Perhaps this seems like an odd combination to some.  However, I see a lot of similarities in these areas--work and family--in that both deal with intensely personal issues that affect major portions of our life's endeavors.  

I discuss neutrality principles generally and labor and employment issues in particular on my other blogs.  See On Being a Neutral, and  On New Mexico Labor and Employment Law.   Here, I will focus on "matters of family, child protection and home."  In this, my inaugural posting, I will address New Medico separation, divorce and parentage proceedings, from perspective of a domestic relations mediator.